It is not something I'll ever get used to

Everytime someone passes, it is difficult. They could just be someone who I have only taken care of for a few days and it still hits me hard.
I had a patient die on Christmas Eve, well not techinically die on my watch per se, but even still. We I went in to check on them, it didn't look good. The sight of someone dead isn't something I think I'll ever get used to.
Why is it when we die, it is usually with our eyes open? Is there something that is symbolic about seeing the world as you know it for one last time? Ugh, it was tough weekend, filled with lots of death and dying at work.

Pile it on...I can take it

I know that this sounds terrible, but there are days when I just sucked at my job and couldn't handle it. If was terrible at what I did and couldn't get everything done, I might actually get some help. Instead, i run my butt off and get it all done with (minimal I might add) overtime. Granted I have probably only ever gotten out on time 3 times since i have worked there and usually have anywhere from a half and hour to 3 hours of over time everyday just to get things done. I have no idea what a normal 40 hour paycheck looks like...and I think should know what it looks like. Hopefully things will turn around soon.

Love for a lifetime...

Everyday there is this man who comes in to see his wife...everyday. It makes my heart melt. I want that!
There are days when she doesn't know who he is, but he comes faithfully. I admire him, I admire them. That is what true love is.

Wishing for a change

I love my job, but there are days when it is just hard. Almost too hard, overwhelming. But that doesn't mean that I don't give 100%, because I do...but it seems like everyone around me doesn't and it is SO frustrating. It is people's lives we are dealing with, if you aren't going to give your best, then don't bother working at all. These are someone's mother's and father's, someone that means the world to someone else. You'd expect the best for your loved one's, so they deserve the best of us.
There are days when some of them just try my patience and it is waning, but I still deserve it to them to try. I have to remind myself that its not personal.

Jinx

Sometimes just saying something won't happen, will make it happen. As I was leaving work on the other day I said to someone, wow, I have NEVER sent anyone out yet and I've been here for 3 months and bingo, that was all it took. I had to send out someone yesterday morning. So what have I learned from this: even if you are thinking don't always say it, you just might will it to happen.

Sometimes all it takes is a little time

I have had this patient for a few days now and he keeps having falls. I ordered some mats for his bedside and told him how important it is for him to be safe. He refuses to ring his call light for help because he doesn't want to be a burden. He was so confused as to why he was even there at our facility.
So I took some time with him and explained to him how he was there was therapy to get stronger so he'll be able to do things on his own. He seemed so relieved to have an answer. After that he used his call light and was much more relaxed. Sometimes all it takes is a little time to make a difference.

Perspective

I have learned that there is always a story behind how people are the way they are. Good, bad or indifferent, there are reasons why are the way we are and there usually is a story behind it.
Take for example some of the people that I work with. As we spend more time together I find out things about them and it really puts it all into perspective on why they act the way that they do. All of our experiences shape us into the people we are. The same goes with my patients and learning these little bits, helps me make better decisions in how to deal with them.

Ordering...

I have learned that even if you order something from Pharmacy...it doesn't mean you will get it. It is so frustrating sometimes to work in a facility that doens't have a pharmacy and you have to wait to get what you need. We have a Pyxis, but if you need to pull anything out of it that is a narcotic, you need to wait for approval from the pharmacy. There is paperwork that needs to be filled out before you can pull it and then you have to wait for a response. Now I will admit that when meds need to be pulled from our Pyxis, the pharmacy is pretty quick for a turn around response. But, its just an extra step that makes things take EVEN longer.

New blog

Well I decided that it might be best for me to start a blog and discuss what I have learned since becoming an RN. Everyone says that they learn something new everyday that they are a nurse and I too have found this to be true. Now its time for me to share.